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| Because the Drugs are Good |
| Sunday, February 17, 2008 |
I've decided that I will have the next reconstructive surgery on my breast. I was told I have to wait 6 months, which will be this summer. The surgery isn't actually a surgery, it's a process. They will first go in and put a silicone pouch inside my breast above the current skin graft. They will progressively inject saline into the pouch stretching the skin until they have enough extra skin to cut out the skin graft & cover the area.
 One thing is for sure....I will not be using the same plastic surgeon. I thought the whole point in using a plastic surgeon is because they made things appear as natural as possible. Unfortunately the plastic surgeon who did my surgery left me with a pretty wide and ugly 7" scar down my arm. I don't think the skin graft not lightening up is his falt, but trust me...the scar on my arm is unacceptable. You know how the military doctors has a reputation of leaving people with some pretty nasty scars...well, I believe my plastic surgeon missed his calling. He's a super nice guy & has the best bedside manner, but when it all comes down to it, he didn't do a good job.
So It's decided. I'm going to go under the knife again...ugh!Labels: plastic surgery, skin cancer, surgery |
posted by Stephanie @ 10:22 PM  |
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| One Brick at a Time |
| Tuesday, January 22, 2008 |
I had a follow up visit with the plastic surgeon today. He takes a look at my breast first. He says "It shouldn't be that dark. I wonder why it didn't fade. It should have faded by now." Thanks doc! Because apparently you didn't know I needed more depressing news right at this very moment! So he suggests that it might be lighter in 3 months and we can try bleaching it then. (Bleaching it now wouldn't work because it is too dark. It is still the color of a scab...but without the scab.)
I filed for unemployment today. I'll get more than I thought. Still not a huge amount though. Now I just have to hope I get it.
One day in at my parents and I already want to know what are the chances of success if I jump out the second story window? Now I remember why I was in a rush to leave the last time.
Damian asks me all the time why my relationship with my mom is so strained. I didn't know it was. We go to lunch all the time, hang out a lot...really what is wrong with our relationship? He says its just surface though. He's probably right, but it works for me. I guess during one of my surgeries they were in the waiting room talking and Mom told Damian that I don't tell them anything. I don't ever let them know what is going on in my life. Until today I thought that was ridiculous...sure I do. But today I realized, no, I don't. I also realized why. Mom isn't one of those people who you can go to and say "I'm in trouble can you do me a favor." Because if you do, she will for the next five years say "Do you need to be eating out today? Remember 5 years ago I had to fill up your gas tank when you were low on gas." And she is also one to give you the hour and a half lecture before she helps you...making you feel about 2 inches tall.
I had forgotten about that. I hadn't remembered that she did this stuff, but unconsciously I must have remembered, because for the last 4 or 5 years I have avoided it at all costs. I built a wall between me and my mom, and hadn't even realized it. I had to move back to my parents house 8 years ago after my divorce and it has taken those 8 years to have a decent "surface" relationship with my mom. If I stay in this house more than 2 weeks I swear we may never talk again.
OK, so if you don't believe me, and think I am exaggerating. Today, my mom has gotten pissy with me about the following:
1. Setting the timer for 30 minutes on the chicken because "there is no way chicken is done in 30 minutes. You'll get salmonella poisoning. You can die from that. You eat your chicken only cooked 30 minutes? Well that will kill you. Look, look, see my (30 year old) cookbook says you should cook it 20 minutes on each side. You can die...." This went on for at least 6 minutes & all I was doing was setting the timer so I could CHECK the chicken & flip it.
2. Letting Madi run the bath water for more than 2 1/2 minutes. "I still hear the water. Go check on her. Don't let her fill the tub up. Go check. She's knows not to fill it all the way, right?" Serious...she's 9. She's been doing this a while, and hasn't overflowed a tub yet.
3. Having so much stuff to put in her fridge. "If I had known you had this much stuff I would have made room." Yes, she was at my apt yesterday. Yes, she did open the fridge to get the sandwich stuff out we ate for lunch. And yes, she did comment on how much was in my fridge then.
Oh, I could go on. But all of this took place between 6:00 and 11:00 at night & I was gone from 8:00 to 10:45.Labels: moving, plastic surgery, skin cancer |
| posted by Stephanie @ 11:30 PM |
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| Just a quick update |
| Wednesday, November 28, 2007 |
I am doing pretty good today. I started coming down with a cold yesterday, so I am doping myself up to try to kick it before Friday. I don't want anything else delaying my surgery. My swelling has gone down some since yesterday also, which is really good.
Even though I didn't have surgery yesterday, I did have my surgical consult. The area is now too large to just close up or do a flap repair, as originally hoped. Instead, they will definitely have to do a skin graft. They will take an area of skin (5.9cm x 3.6cm) from underneath my arm (you know, where old women get that skin flap)and move it to my breast. The closer to the area, the better chance of a skin tone match. He will then try to just close up my arm. If he is unable to do that, he will take a partial thickness graft from my hip to repair my arm.
The theory behind this is that correcting my breast is the top priority, so it will look the best, the area from my hip would cause little scarring, so really the under side of my arm will have the worst scar, and it won't really be seen that often.
Everything will come from the left side, so at night I will still be able to sleep on my right side or my back.Labels: cancer, plastic surgery, skin cancer, surgery |
| posted by Stephanie @ 3:27 PM |
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| Tomorrow is the big day |
| Monday, November 26, 2007 |
or at least I hope it is. I have an appointment at 9:00 a.m. with the plastic surgeon. He will then either do surgery tomorrow afternoon or Friday, depending on how in depth the surgery will be. If they do it tomorrow they will be working me in at the end of the doctors day. Friday, I am actually on the books. I am really hoping for tomorrow though.
I'm ready for this to be over with. Plus, I would really like the extra days to heal. I am planning to return to work next Monday. Surgery tomorrow would give me 7 days to heal.
I have been in a good bit of pain this weekend. My breast really started swelling on Saturday and Sunday. This morning it was swelling so bad for my shirt to touch it was extreme pain. I called the doctor, and he wanted to see me to make sure there was no infection. Everything was fine...just painful, but no infection.
I'm guessing my breast feels like a breast the day after having implants put in. It is very hard and swollen, definitely sitting in an upright position. I told Damian tonight, maybe I do want to go ahead and get implants this week, because I just may never sign up for this pain again.
I'm counting on my sister to update everyone tomorrow if I do go into surgery, since there will be no time to update myself.Labels: cancer, plastic surgery, skin cancer, surgery |
| posted by Stephanie @ 11:50 PM |
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| In Review... |
| Thursday, November 22, 2007 |
My page has gotten quite cluttered in the day and a half that I have been back home. I do hate the space the paid post take up, but someone has to make a living! Sorry :)
So in review...I went on a "mini" vacation, I am finally cancer free! (and posted links to surgery pictures), and My tribute to Thanksgiving.
Does anybody besides me ever feel like some of the good posts get lost in the crap?
Oh, and in closing...
 Labels: cancer, pictures, shopping, skin cancer, surgery, Thanksgiving |
| posted by Stephanie @ 10:15 AM |
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| I'm CANCER FREE!!! |
| Wednesday, November 21, 2007 |
I just got the call today! "We got it all this time!" Third times the charm! Damian and I did the happy dance. I think my mom did too, but she is at work. Then we prayed, and thanked the Lord! Thank you all for your prayers! He heard your prayers and my tears.
My plastic surgery will not be until next week. I think on Tuesday, but I'll probably know later today.
So here is my way of posting pictures, without you having to see them if you do not want. So if you want to see the very graphic pictures from surgery, just click these links...The day after my first surgery, Immediately after my second surgery, and 4 days after the 2nd surgery. I don't have pictures after the 3rd surgery yet. They will remove my bandages on Tuesday, when I go in for the plastic surgery consult, so I will get more pictures then too.
So since Friday isn't boob day, then it will be shoes day, and Tuesday can be boob day! :) Again, thanks for all the prayers!Labels: cancer, pictures, skin cancer, surgery |
| posted by Stephanie @ 11:28 AM |
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| It's My Pity Party, I'll Cry if I Want To! |
| Friday, November 16, 2007 |
Today I will pout! I will whine! I will ask "what if"! I'm tired of being told "Don't worry about what you don't know" I know this, but I'm tired of hearing it! If it were your boob you would worry; you would whine; you would ask "what if".
This morning it was a bit nippy, so when I went to the restroom I decided to look at my boobies. My right boobie was reacting just as it should ~ in full upright position. This is when I noticed my left boob was not. Is my left headlight permanently out? Which makes me wonder just what functions this boobie will have. When I have a baby will only my right boobie fill with milk? Will I have a double d and a b at the same time? Will I get any pleasure from my left boobie? Or will it forever be dead weight?
To Tattoo or Not To Tattoo?
I have often thought that if I ever had a large scar that I would tattoo over it. I never thought my large scar would be across my breast. I think boobie tattoos are pretty trashy; so am I a hypocrite if I now get a boobie tattoo? Really, why am I worried about this right now? This sitting here all day thing is really starting to wear me down!Labels: breast, cancer, skin cancer, surgery |
| posted by Stephanie @ 10:50 AM |
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| I'm not 10! |
| Thursday, November 15, 2007 |
I had another surgery today. This was the worst surgery I have ever had! It was done by local anesthesia again, which means more shots in the boob. Only this time the doctor stuck the needle in an open wound. That was pleasant, let me tell you. I wasn't as strong this go around either. This time I cried. The surgery took a lot longer, and I actually heard the doctor cutting out the tissue. You would be amazed how close your breast is to your ear! Afterwards they did the whole burn my skin thing again. (I really hate that part), and then stitched pig skin over my wound. It is supposed to cover the wound to help keep infection out, and lessen the pain.
So here is where the title comes in. I say, he doc, how many stitches are you putting in? He says "just enough, but not too many" I laugh and say, you must be a parent because you mastered the art of avoiding answering the question. Then I say How big is the area, and he dodged that question too. Keep in mind this is the Resident, and not my actual doctor.
When we got home, Damian showed my neighbor the pictures (I let him take pictures). I haven't looked though, not even at the pictures. So Danielle is looking at the pictures, and I say how close to my nipple did he go? She starts to answer and Damian says "Danielle don't answer her questions..." Too late though, she had already told me that the doctor cut all the way up to my nipple, through the areola, all the way up to the nipple.
So what happens if they didn't get it all? Will I lose my nipple? Why is everyone avoiding telling me this stuff? It is my nipple, shouldn't I get a say in it? I guess I'll address it if it happens, but come on...stop babying me. I'm going to find out sooner or later!
Oh, and here is a blog survey? Would you want to see pictures of my surgery? I have pictures of the wound site after surgery 1 and surgery 2 so far? Would it be really gross to post those?Labels: cancer, pigs skin, skin cancer, surgery |
| posted by Stephanie @ 6:56 PM |
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| About Me |
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Name: Stephanie
Home: Macon, Georgia, United States
About Me: Holy Crap I will be 29 soon! My friends and I are creating a before we turn 30 bucket list...hmmm what to add?
See my complete profile
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